Wednesday September 29, 2010

Went for my 2^nd interview but found out the job was only temporary until the end of October. There has been a serious breakdown of communication with this company since I applied. I’m not at all confident with my potential employment there.

Tuesday September 28, 2010

I woke up with a headache from last night so I decided to shower and pack up and go with Elli to see Devil’s Tower then head to Casper Wyoming to visit my father. Devils Tower was very peaceful and serene and I remember the many times I visited as a child. Sometimes I long to be that child that is loved and accepted by his parents and is kept safe from danger. Those basic needs are good to be aware of because I am liable to seek those various needs in my poly relationships to varying degrees. Properly identifying a need and matching that need with a specific person who is able to fulfill it will make the relationship more satisfying and less stressful. Remember in poly relationships you do not expect one person to fulfill all your needs and instead look to specific relationships to fulfill specific needs.

As Elli and I left the town of Moorcroft I got a phone call from a potential job opportunity but they want to interview me again tomorrow at noon. We decide to scrap going to Casper because we wouln’t have enough time. We backed tracked to take a shorter way back to Denver. When we get home Elli takes me out to buy a new shirt and tie for the interview (she is a sweetie). We then go out to eat a wonderful dinner and talk. Elli is kind and is very loving I am fortunate to have her in my life.

Monday September 29, 2010

I woke up tired and sick but decided to take the trip to Hulett Wyoming anyway. The day was very long and the ride uncomfortable. We arrive late in the evening to Hulett and check into our motel which had mold behind a wall. We were able to move rooms but the mold gave me a headache all night. We ate at the only restaurant that charged $18.00 for a plate of pasta. It was lame very lame. I regret that I was unable to be better company for Elli and wish this was a better trip.

Saturday September 28, 2010

Spent the morning with Alice but I was still sick and so I left early. It was too bad because her loins were on fire! Maybe when she gets back from her trip we can in sync and make up for time lost.

Thursday September 26, 2010

Alice came over to my place this evening and we had a good talk about my concerns about her anger issues, how it relates to my own anger issues and the general direction of our relationship. She was upset at first because she felt I was attacking and judging her but I made sure she knew I was actively listening and kept bringing some of her issues back to my past issues. I’m by no means perfect and know how difficult it is to work through issues. We have very similar personality types and interact with reality in much the same way so although our specific situations are different we tend to handle them in a similar manner. Alice cried for a time, which is a big deal for Alice because crying makes one vulnerable and even weak in our eyes. I reassured her and used myself in several examples as to the things I have done well concerning my anger and the things I haven’t done so well. I felt very emotional connected to her.

Friday, September 17, 2010

Today was my day with Elli but I didn’t get as much time as I would have liked with her because Josh and I were trying to work out some bugs with my computer. I should be able to begin working on the Razor Girl project on my next off shift now that the computer issue has been resolved. Latter on in the evening Elli and I watched “Irreversible” directed by Gaspar Noe who also directed Carne. Though this movie won’t appeal to the average Hollywood moviegoer I thought over all, Irreversible was a very good movie that was well thought out and really mirrored the cause and effect aspects of reality. Besides the camera work at the very beginning the only other grumble was that the emotionally intense moments lacked the necessary build up in order to experience their full impact. The audience does get to experience but it could have been even more intense. This might be do to culture the differences between French and American social dynamics or emotional delivery in cinema. Though a harsh dose of reality it was a good movie that comes highly recommended.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

The interview went well and I should know in a few weeks what’s available. I ran some errands and read more of Shogun. Latter Renee came over and we talked for a while then I was fortunate enough to experience her skills at fellatio. Renee left and Elli arrived home from work, we talked a bit before going into her bedroom and made love. I felt really connected to both Elli and Renee. I felt loved and at peace with myself something that rarely seems to happen.