Tracy and I were supposed to see each other today in fact she was going to come down and see my apartment however her husband took the day off and our plans fell through. That happens when all parties are not on board with current relationships and in some ways is reminiscent of how my relationship with Elli was in the very beginning. I guess I feel caught between being poly and having everyone on the same page and understanding that Tracy’s relationship with her husband is not my relationship, it’s hers to do and run as she sees fit. My relationship with Tracy should it ever materialize, will be very different then the one I initially envision my relationships would be when I first ventured into polyamory. I feel as if I am becoming more flexible and realistic with my expectations with my other relationships. I am very fortunate that Elli is not only my primary relationship but she fulfills the deep emotional connection, maternal nurturing and sexual needs that I have been searching for all my life.
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